Navigating the Challenges of Mode Clashes in Parent-Teen Conflicts
Schema Therapy provides valuable insights into the conflicts that arise between parents and adolescents, particularly those aged 12 to 25. One of the key concepts in this approach is the idea of “mode clashes,” which refer to situations where dysfunctional modes are triggered by activated schemas in both parties. These clashes can frequently occur in parent-child relationships, especially during adolescence. A mode clash happens when both the parent and the adolescent respond to each other from their respective maladaptive modes. For example, a parent may be operating in an Over-controller mode while the adolescent is in an Angry Protector mode. In such scenarios, the more the parent tries to exert control, the more the adolescent withdraws, and their anger intensifies. This dynamic not only escalates the conflict but also prevents the recognition of underlying feelings and needs, making peaceful and productive resolution difficult. Mode clashes are a common reason families seek therapy, especially when parents bring their adolescents for help. Addressing and resolving these clashes—whether they occur at home or in other environments—is a crucial component of Schema Therapy for this age group. Viewing conflicts through the lens of mode clashes helps to remove blame and encourages family members to work together to resolve impasses. This approach also offers tools for families to manage these dynamics independently. The mode clash framework emphasizes the importance of identifying and negotiating the underlying needs of both parties. Common needs, such as safety for the parent and freedom for the adolescent, can be explored and balanced so that everyone’s needs are addressed. By helping both parents and adolescents recognize their modes, Schema Therapy fosters greater empathy and self-awareness, paving the way for meaningful change within the family system.
This presentation will demonstrate practical strategies for working with mode clashes in Schema Therapy, highlighting methods for recognizing underlying needs and facilitating productive negotiations within families.
Ida Shaw is an experienced schema therapist trainer recognized internationally for her creative and distinctive interventions. She is the author of three books on ST and director of the Schema Therapy Institute Cleveland. Maria Galimzyanova is a professor of developmental psychology and a certified ST trainer and supervisor.
Learning Objectives
1. Participants will be able to apply the concept of “mode clash” to their work with children and parents.
2. Participants will be able to identify the core needs underlying mode clashes and facilitate productive negotiations.
Speakers
Ida ShawClick for moreIda A. Shaw, M.A., is an International Society of Schema Therapy (ISST) Certified Supervisor-Trainer specializing in Individual, Child-Adolescent, and Group Schema Therapy (ST). She currently serves as co-director of the Schema Therapy Institute Midwest in Cleveland. She co-developed Group Schema Therapy with Joan Farrell and was instrumental in the development of Child-Adolescent Schema Therapy. In recognition of her significant contributions to schema therapy, Ida Shaw was elected as an Honorary Lifetime Member of the ISST in 2020. For a decade, she held the position of Training Director at the Center for Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) Treatment & Research at the Indiana University School of Medicine. Her leadership extended to major international schema therapy trials, including supervising and training participants in a five-country study involving 495 patients focused on Group Schema Therapy for borderline personality disorder, as well as an experimental case series for dissociative identity disorder (DID). Ida Shaw has authored three influential books on schema therapy: Group Schema Therapy for BPD (Wiley, 2012), The Schema Therapy Clinician’s Guide (Wiley, 2014), and Experiencing Schema Therapy from the Inside Out: A Self-Practice/Self-Reflection Workbook (Guilford Press, 2018). Her bibliography also includes numerous book chapters and journal articles. She is widely recognized for her creativity and expertise in developing experiential interventions, which have been instrumental in the advancement of Group and Child-Adolescent Schema Therapy. Ida Shaw served as Chair of the Child-Adolescent Schema Therapy Certification Committee and was a member of the Training & Certification Advisory Board of ISST for many years, further shaping the field through her dedication and service
Maria GalimzyanovaClick for moreMaria Galimzyanova, Ph.D is certified ISST trainer and supervisor in Individual schematherapy, group schematherapy and schematherapy for children and adolescents.
Maria is a member of St-Petersburg Institute of Schema-Therapy and works with children, adolescents, parents and adults in a psychological center “Anima” in St–Petersburg.
